Beautiful On A Budget

In this episode, Lyssia sits down with Alyssa Martin, the creator behind Alyssa Martin Home, whose content has helped thousands of people design spaces they actually love without spending more than they need to. After years of watching people feel stuck, overwhelmed, or convinced they needed a bigger budget to fix what was bothering them about their home, Alyssa became focused on a question most of us never think to ask: what if the problem was never money to begin with?

The conversation breaks down why so many people feel paralyzed when it comes to designing their home, and how the constant stream of trends can quietly pull you further from your own style without you ever realizing it. They explore why a beautiful home has far less to do with perfection and far more to do with intention, how thrifting and layering can do what expensive purchases never could, what to actually splurge on versus what to stop wasting money on, and why the smallest shifts in a space often make the biggest difference.

Alyssa also shares what years of helping people transform their homes has taught her about what we all instinctively want from the spaces we live in, and the one shift in thinking she would give anyone who feels like their home just isn't working.

By the end of this episode, you may realize that the home you have always wanted is a lot closer than you think. Not because you need more money, but because you finally know how to see what is already in front of you.

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Alyssa Martin
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Transcript

When A Home Feels Like You

Alyssa Martin 0:00

Any home can be beautiful. If someone were to walk in my house and say, what a beautiful house, I would say, thank you. That's a nice compliment. But if someone were to walk in my house and say, it just feels like you, that's like the best compliment you could get.

Lyssia Katan 0:12

What's a mistake that you made early on that you're like, yup, lesson learned.

Alyssa Martin 0:17

Just because AI or any Pinterest or anyone else, all the designers with all the trends that are popular, just because they say this is what's beautiful, that doesn't mean anything. The worst thing ever to me is a home that looks identical to someone else's.

Lyssia Katan 0:31

How do you know when a room finally feels right? A lot of it is a What if creating a home you love had less to do with money and more to do with how you see what's already in front of you? Welcome to Room to Think. Today I'm sitting down with Alyssa Martin. She's the creator of Alyssa Martin Home, where she shares practical, approachable ways to design a home you love without overspending. In this episode, Alyssa breaks down why so many people feel stuck when it comes to design, how trends can quietly pull you away from your own style, and why a beautiful home has less to do with perfection and more to do with intention. We get into thrifting, layering, what to actually scourge on, and the small shifts that can completely transform a space. By the end of this episode, you may realize that creating a home you love is a lot more within reach than you think. Let's get into

Alyssa’s Path Into Design

Lyssia Katan 1:29

it. Alyssa, welcome to the show. Ah, thank you so much for having me. Alyssa Martin is the creator behind Alyssa Martin Home, where she shares approachable DIY and design ideas focused on creating a home you love without overspending. Alyssa, welcome to Room to Think.

Alyssa Martin 1:45

Oh, thank you so much. I'm really excited to be here and chat with y'all today.

Lyssia Katan 1:49

Me too. So let's start at the beginning. What do you do and why do you do it?

Alyssa Martin 1:53

Yeah, so this I always feel like this is sort of like a multifaceted question when people ask me that. So for all intents and purposes and for this podcast, in short, um, I share design inspiration, DIYs, and then also just the process of making our cozy little Oklahoma cottage a home over on Instagram at Alyssa MartinHome. Um, and then sort of on the side, I take on design, interior design consults as they come. Um, and then just to make things even further complicated, I'm a graphic designer. So I take on clients doing that, and then I'm also a wife and a mom to three beautiful little girls. So I feel like no day looks the same, but um my my focus right now is all the interior design stuff that I do over on um Instagram, and I just am loving it. I have such a passion for that and teaching others, helping others create a home that they love. And so um I found that people are enjoying that.

Lyssia Katan 2:52

Yeah, they sure are, myself included. That's that's really how I found you. How did you get into it? Was this just something that you've always loved or maybe something you stumbled upon?

Alyssa Martin 3:00

Yes, I know. So um I've I I've always been a creative. I've always that's my background, marketing and photography and um, you know, all the things that creative minds like math, just throw that out the window for me. I don't and I just don't, this does not do well with my brain. Um, but so I, you know, got married. We had our, we had a home. We've all we had rented at first and that kind of thing. And I thought, oh, I just want to, we had a small budget, but I just would use what we had and and make it something that I thought was beautiful. And I thought that was really fun. And then about eight years ago, we purchased our first home, which is the home that we're in now. Um, and it was a fixer-upper. And so that's where I just started diving into, you know, I had to make all these decisions on to make this house what we wanted it to be. And I made a whole lot of mistakes at the beginning. Um, I mean, I really did. I had never done it before. I didn't know my style, I didn't know what I truly loved. Um, and I looked at Pinterest and I thought, well, I guess my house is supposed to look like this. And so I just started making decisions based on that, but learning along the way, and then some friends started, they'd see my house and they'd say, Oh, I really like it. You know, will you help me with mine? And I'd start just saying, Well, I don't know. I'm not necessarily a professional, but this is what I think, and this is what I think would make your house look better. And um, slowly but surely I got more and more and more questions from friends, and they're like, You need to share this. And I'm like, no, no, no, whatever. Well, then last year I had my third baby, and there's nothing like postpartum to make you welcome a whole new season in life. And so I was like, I'm just gonna start sharing. Like, I feel like I've honed in on my style. I feel like I've um sort of got a grit, I've learned so much. I I was just like studying and learning and reading all these books and figuring out um all these, you know, design elements and things that make a house what you want it to be. And so I just started sharing the knowledge that I had accumulated over the past decade. And um I think it's just sort of taken off and I've really enjoyed, I've really enjoyed mainly just connecting with other people who are trying to do the same thing that I was trying to do 10 years ago and who are still a little bit stuck where they're at, and just help them create something that's beautiful

Let Your Home’s Architecture Lead

Alyssa Martin 5:18

on their budget at a price that they can afford.

Lyssia Katan 5:20

That is a great place to start. And are you still in Oklahoma?

Alyssa Martin 5:24

Yes, so yeah, we live uh in Cushing, so we're like right in between the two big cities, right in between Tulsa and Oklahoma City. We love it here.

Lyssia Katan 5:32

So tell me, I've never actually been to Oklahoma. What is the style there? And did you get any inspiration from living in that area?

Alyssa Martin 5:39

The style here. I are you well, I mean, it's very, it's it's rural, especially where where we are. We're a oil town. Um, and so I live out, we have a little bit of pro just four acres. Um, but I say that because a lot of the people around us have, you know, a hundred acres. I don't where where are you at? Are you in New York?

Lyssia Katan 5:59

I'm in Miami, but in my four acres in New York, like that's a big deal.

Alyssa Martin 6:04

Exactly. So this kind of depends on like where you are, California. You know, they're gonna go, what? You know, yeah. So, but this is a this is very common out where where we live. So um, houses, you know, I mean, we have neighborhoods and stuff, of course, but but uh but yeah, so I think it's sort of house dependent. I mean, in the city it's gonna be different, but where we are, there could be a complete we have this stone little cottage, okay, but our neighbor does not have that at all. It's a completely different, more just sort of your typical neighborhood type house. Um, and so I think like paying attention to the architectural style of your home, especially where we live, and just rolling with that versus where does this fit into this city's, you know, style? That's sort of what's what's gonna be your best bet here.

Lyssia Katan 6:52

Yeah, that's why I'm asking because like, is there more Americana country design out there? Whereas maybe on the coast you get a little bit more of like uh the Nantucket coastal vibe. Does that influence your style?

Alyssa Martin 7:05

Yeah, I would say so. I think if you had some type of beach house, some coastal house out here in Oklahoma where the nearest lake is like an hour away, um, you're probably it's probably gonna feel out of out of reach. So I would say a lot of, you know, more these country homes, Americana, sort of these classic American, just your standard um, you know, country home would probably be a style, the style that's most common here.

Lyssia Katan 7:33

That is very cool. I mean, we have listeners from all over the all over the world, really. Yeah, it makes sense. Being able to talk about like the country home, the American country home. It's something that not everyone has seen. Can you describe a couple like elements that make something like really like country home?

Alyssa Martin 7:50

Oh, okay. Um, I would say, well, so I have a lot of stone on our my house, but also I love something like cedar siding or like not like cedar siding, like mountain, but like cedar shake, um uh tie roof roofing or a lot of um the lap siding that you'll see, like, you know, like um not like I don't want to say modern farmhouse, but like farmhouse. Um I even like wraparound porches or dormers or um things that have like um I just picture like wooden rocking chairs out front and ferns hanging from the porch and inside where there's like old like um wooden elements, like you know, trim pieces that cased openings um and these closed-in, like um homes that necessarily aren't these grand big open homes that you might see in like more modern cities, you know, um, but more of like a more nostalgic type home.

Lyssia Katan 8:55

That's so beautiful. That's not something that I mean in Miami I don't get exposed to that almost ever, but that makes sense. It's something when you go out to the Midwest, out even further, that's really what you get to see. And it's nice that the architecture reflects the space. So is there a space that inspired you or maybe continues to inspire you in your

Learning From A Renovation Story

Lyssia Katan 9:18

work?

Alyssa Martin 9:18

Yes. So I would say the home that I grew up in. So let me give you a little bit of backstory here. Um, my parents' home, the home, my my the home I grew up in is so beautiful. I grew up in Colorado. So talking about different styles of homes, this was a mountain home. This was cedar-sided, you know, just big, huge windows that overlooked the mountains. Sounds like my parents maybe had money or something. It was far from that. So when I was about eight years old, we moved out to the five acres. They always wanted some land. It was this treed lot that was like on the side of this mountain, and it had this old dilapidated house. It was disgusting. It was filled with animal feces and they had dumpster after dumpster. They completely gutted this whole entire house. So for the uh they spent the first few weeks, it was unlivable, but they spent the first few weeks and they um gutted the basement and we moved into just the basement. So it was like four of us kids. We lived in this 10 by 10 room, the four kids did with two bunk beds jammed against each other. We had concrete floors, they had covered it with uh, they painted like eight coats of kills on this floor just to cover the animal feces that had been there. So then they spent the next like 10 months renovating the upstairs. They made it beautiful. And um over the course of the next 10, 15, 20 years, they added on like living room, sunroom, a master suite, a garage. So it turned into be this beautiful home. But all that to say, it just sort of taught me like, hey, they saw the potential in a space that was ugly. Like any home can be beautiful. Anything ugly can be made beautiful. It may take a lot of work. But they also taught themselves how to do it. They didn't have the money to hire it all out and they did it all themselves. Um, and they just took it on because they they could see like what it could be. And um, my mom has this knack with just she just has an eye for design. And they we never had like a lot of money, but she would take the things that she had. She had some like also some things that were passed down from her mom, who was also very who loved beautiful things, and she just made it, she made it beautiful. Like she just had every space was intentional, every space had um just something unique in it. It told a story, and she loved secondhand shopping before it was cool. Like that was her secret sauce. Now it's like cool, you know, people like go to everything's picked over now, right? Secondhand stuff, but she liked it before it was cool, and it just was beautiful. And so I've taken that, I didn't appreciate that when I was younger. But now I go back, I've shared a little bit about it on my social media too. But I go back and I'm like, this just feels like a warm hug when you walk inside. And she just has a knack of she didn't have the money to buy something high-end to perfectly fit the space, but she took something that maybe didn't go and somehow made it work. And I love that.

Lyssia Katan 12:08

That sounds like someone who you gain a lot of inspiration from. Have you looked to her a lot throughout your career and and time designing your own home?

Alyssa Martin 12:17

Yeah, absolutely. I call her all the time and I'm like, mom, you know, help me decide between these two topes that my husbands say are identical, and I'm like, they're totally different. So they've actually since moved to Oklahoma. They live about an hour away from us, but she has a new home there. They they have a new home there. And it's funny because I walk into their home here, which is a completely different style, a completely different home altogether, but somehow it still feels like home. And so that was even a learning experience to me, going, okay, it has nothing to do necessarily with this cedar-sided mountain home, but it has everything to do with like how my mom infused them and their story into this home that made it feel like, you know, just feel nostalgic the moment I walked in from the smells, the things, the art on the walls, the things that are there. And so um that that's been a learning experience too, for sure. But yeah, my mom's always my first phone call when I'm I'm like, I don't trust anybody else necessarily, but I'll call her and I'm like, tell me the undertone juicy, you know. And uh, she always has some good ideas too on like just how to fix a problem that you're like, I don't know, how do I get there? How do I, how do I make this problem better? And she'll go, what if you did this or this or this? And I'm like, I've never thought about that. So she's a good uh person to bounce ideas off of.

Lyssia Katan 13:37

That's also really interesting that you say that it wasn't the home that you grew up in, but it still feels like home. What do you think is it about that space that makes it home? Is it your mom's energy? Is it the art or pass down things, or is it just like the feeling? How do you put your finger on it?

Alyssa Martin 13:55

Yeah, I I mean, I think it's the feeling and the and the things that are in there, but I just to kind of expand on that a little bit. I think, you know, my my dad travels the world. He's um, he does a lot of missions work and he loves art. So he goes whenever wherever he goes, or at least for a while he did that. Now their house is getting full of it. But, anyways, he would bring home like an original piece of art from that location. And they would frame them. They've got all these colorful mats and uh just different frames, and they have this art all over their house. It's beautiful. You just walk around, your eye just bounces around going through the room, going like, oh my gosh, this, you know, these are all so unique and different. And then my mom has these passed down pieces from her family that tell a story. I think it just is all about a storied space. So infusing your own personality and infusing like artwork that means something to you or different, even sounds, you know. My mom always had this big grandfather clock, and all growing up, every hour would chime. And I kind of always like, I don't know, I didn't pay attention. My grand, my my her grandkids, my kids now are like, why is that clock so loud? You know, when I go to the when we go to their house and I'm like, I don't even hear it, but there's something nostalgic about this clock. Um, and so I don't know, I think, you know, I think that if someone were to walk in my house and say, what a beautiful house, I would say, well, thank you. That that's a nice compliment. But if someone were to walk in my house and say, This is a beautiful house and it just feels like you, I would be that's like the best compliment you could give me because I want a home that has personality and feeling and that feels like a warm, inviting hug, and it feels like me and my family, and is not just some because you know, a showcase catalog, that's beautiful, but there's nothing special about it.

Lyssia Katan 15:48

Yeah, and it's something uh we we've spoken about before on this podcast that the catalog house looks beautiful, but it doesn't feel

Thrifting Strategy And What To Buy

Lyssia Katan 15:56

like home. And you talk a lot about in your content picking a couple pieces, thrifting them, and really working around that. Maybe some new pieces, maybe some old pieces, but how do you make that feel approachable? Because thrifting used to be the not cool thing. Now, like you said, it feels like everyone's thrifting and and and pieces are picked over. How do you balance that and and still recommend people going to thrift shops and creating spaces that really feel like them?

Alyssa Martin 16:24

Yeah, I think a trick to uh a space to feel put together and well designed is a mix of high and low, meaning uh, you know, high end, and then also maybe some things that are not high end, cheap, whatever, inexpensive. It would be probably the nicer way to say that. Um, and then also um save versus splurge, right? So there's some things you might want to splurge on that makes sense and it um will really elevate the space and take it to the next level. And then there's some things that you can save on, and those things might be the thing that you find at a thrift store or um whatever. And so, like I so whenever I start a new space, I try to think in my head about a budget. I actually I just created a reel about this actually. But um, so if I have a thousand dollars to refresh a bathroom, um, there might be like I I I just did this with my own bathroom. I had a thousand dollars that I wanted to use, and um, I had a shower curtain that was higher, it was a $200 shower curtain, which I think is kind of higher end. I think that's a kind of more expensive for a shower curtain. Um, but I knew that that would be like almost a whole wall in the bathroom, and it would really like it's really what I was envisioning for the space. So I took the $200 out of that $1,000 budget and used that. But then I also went thrifting and I found this little lamp for $10. That's like the perfect thing for the corner in this bathroom. Whereas I looked online at some other ones and they were every bit of a hundred dollars, you know, and so like I know there's like a balance there, but um, if you stick to a budget, it doesn't really matter how you make up that budget if you can kind of fix everything. We bought a really cheap toilet. We bought a hundred dollar toilet, the cheapest one we could find at Lowe's. I've got kids' potty training, like I don't need some designer, you know, like toilet that's gonna get um messed up in here. So, but I but the toilet seat was like plastic and just like meh, like not comfortable even to use. So um we bought a uh a wooden seat to go on top. So the toilet was a hundred dollars and the seat was 50, but it elevated it, it looks so good in there, you know, and it added a wood tone that the space was missing. So just things like that. I mean, thrifting things are looking picked over, but if you just continue to be diligent about going into these thrift stores, even if you have five minutes and being a hundred percent okay with walking out with nothing, then you will find stuff. I mean, I will go into five different thrift stores and then I'll find one ten dollar thing in one of them, maybe, you know, and then but it's a gym, you know, like I couldn't find that elsewhere and definitely for not for that cost. So um, I think if you're just gonna, if you're okay with a treasure hunt and you're okay just zipping in and out, and you're okay with buying nothings, people want to go in these places and they feel like they have to leave with something, but you don't. That's it's still a successful trip because you you figured out you didn't miss out on anything. Um, but you can slowly thrift your way through a house and uh marketplace is also another huge win these days.

Lyssia Katan 19:40

So I love marketplace and a good thrift store. So when you are in there, how for someone who's maybe never thrifted before or just is not that good at it, what do you look for? How do you know something's good versus something that's like gonna fall apart or something that maybe someone donated from, you know, like how what do you look for?

Alyssa Martin 19:59

Yeah, that's a good question. Um, I look for the the real material. So for instance, I want something that's real brass. And a lot of times you can get that from the weight of it. You know, like, oh, this is like some kind of cheapy thing, or wow, this is a really nice heavy lamp or plate or you know, vase or whatever it is. Um I also try to sort of think through some of the higher end or like um brands or you know, designers that you know have a name brand. And if you see those, then you know, oh man, this might be something, you know. Um, so kind of just having a Rolodex in your brain of some of that, that's a big deal. Um, and I think a lot of times just um feeling like uh touching it, like feeling like going, okay, this is this is something nicer versus heavy versus I already said that, but I'm trying to like put a but I you know I'm a part of this club. If you if you don't know about it, it's thrift with a makerista. Have you heard of this? No. Have you heard of her? She is um so the makerista on Instagram, she has this thrift club, and they talk a lot about this kind of stuff, but they also you can join it. I'm like giving a call to action for her, but you know, I'm a part of it. It's fun. Um, and they have like a list of thrift stores in every city in the United States, and um, there's this people, there's just like these thrift maniacs in there, and they'll like post things they find, anyways. It's kind of fun, but they talk a lot about that on how you sort of can pick out. And I think the more you do it, practice makes perfect. It is a muscle. Um, and the more you go in there and you start seeing things, the more you go, nope, that's not my style. That's not gonna work in my house. Cause that's a lot of it too. Is seeing something, it's pretty, yeah. But does it go in your house? Do you truly love it, or is it just the prettiest thing on this shelf? Because sometimes you're going, everything on this shelf is hideous, except for this is. Okay, yeah, but does that go good in your house? And do you truly love it? Or are you just going it's like the prettiest thing here? You know, and so I have a list of things I need and I'm wanting and I'm looking for when I thrift. So of course, sometimes I'll veer off and find this special piece, but in general, I'm going in and I'm like, I need a lamp for this bathroom. I need a credenza to go in my entryway. I'm looking for the perfect wall piece to go, you know, on this wall in my master bedroom, like whatever the case may be. But I'm always looking for original art. That's a big deal. Um, real canvas with paint that you can, you know, see like there's layers on it. It's not a print, also signed artwork. Um, that's huge. And always remember you can reframe it if the frame's ugly. If you have original art you love, you can always reframe it. I don't know. I hope some of that helps. But real wood, also that particle board, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Just skip it altogether. That's junk. You do not want to spend money for that. So always feel for real wood, which is typically really heavy. And when you tap on it, it doesn't click. And a lot of times there's like Thomasville or stuff, like a stamp on the inside of the drawer, you know, that will tell you like the brand.

Lyssia Katan 23:16

Yeah. And also, you you made a good point about like there's a lot of stuff at these thrift stores. Also, it depends where you go. Like these thrift shops can be massive sometimes and it's overwhelming. So knowing exactly what you're looking for, like, I'm looking for a lamp, I'm looking for a coffee table, and it actually helps you filter through the stuff that is pretty and might draw you to this way or that way, but is distracting you from your task at hand. You're on a mission.

Alyssa Martin 23:42

Yeah, exactly. And if you come out of the thrift store spending 50 bucks on junk you don't need, well, then that's $50 you could have added towards something you did need, you know, and would

Save Versus Splurge That Matters

Alyssa Martin 23:52

have gone a long way.

Lyssia Katan 23:52

So a lot of your content is about creating a realistic and beautiful space on a budget. What are some things that you're like, definitely this is something you splurge on versus something that you can get on Amazon because you have some amazing Amazon finds on your page as well?

Alyssa Martin 24:10

Yeah, I think that um I think it's honestly case dependent. Um, but but so things that I think make like transform a space are gonna be paint, which that's cheap, but um paint, rugs, like and textile, textiles and lining. Paint, textiles and lines. So rugs would be a part of the textiles and also drapery um or woven shades or something like that. So um a lot of times the a lot of times textiles end up costing um money. I'm not saying you have to go out and buy like a, you know, a handmade Turkish rug that's antique and costs you $5,000. But I am saying that if you're gonna buy a rug, let's buy one the right size. And sometimes that means a 10 by 14. That's gonna be a little bit bigger or a little bit more expensive. Um, but that's gonna transform your room. If you buy an 8x10 when your space needs a 10 by 14, that's gonna actually take away from the space instead of adding to it. Um, same thing with curtains. Like if you're gonna buy curtains, don't get 84-inch things that make your window look squatty and your ceiling look low and it, you know, comes up from the floor a foot. Like, let's get the right size curtains. It's gonna elongate your window, it's gonna make your ceilings feel taller, it's gonna frame the window like it should, and it's gonna add to the space instead of subtract. You're already spending money on curtains. Spend a few extra dollars and let's make it right. Um, and so and same and bedding can be expensive. That's probably I wouldn't necessarily recommend thrifting bedding. It's just a little weird to me, but um, it can be done, it can be done, but you gotta be careful. So sometimes that can get expensive, but I definitely think the textiles, um textiles is worth it. I think furniture you can thrift the heck out of. Um, and and a lot of the decor and things that are needed in houses. Um, lighting can be thrifted, but textiles make a huge, huge difference.

Lyssia Katan 26:11

Yeah, you were saying about the the drapery, like it's not different than clothes, right? You get a beautiful, tall person, you put short pants on them. It just looks funny. Or like a short person that has a great figure, you put an oversized jacket on them and they kind of look squatty. Like you said, it's it's not different in your house.

Alyssa Martin 26:29

Yes, exactly. Exactly. So I don't even know why they make 84-inch curtains. Like I wish they would just throw them out the window because I mean there's really no house that's less than eight foot, but very, very, very rare anyway. So, um, but anyways, yeah, floor to ceiling drapes, you know, that's gonna make this just gonna make it. I mean, when you have an eight-foot ceiling, of course, it may not go all the way to ceiling if you have like a 15-foot ceiling or something, but um, but it it it really is game changer. And those are the little tweaks that I try to share on my Instagram that for people who feel like they're not good at this, um, that's the kind of thing that would really take their space to the next level. Hey, I want curtains. They maybe even can pick out some curtains that they like, but what they don't know is they don't know what size to get or where to place them, or the curtain stack, you know, 14, 12 inches off of the wall. Like whatever that is, that that's what makes or breaks your space, or knowing the size of the rug that needs to go on the floor, or the proportions, or the scale. Like you can have something pretty, but if it's not to the right scale, it just doesn't do anything for your space. So those are the tips that I try to infuse into a lot of my content to try to help people go, you can do this. And here's a few tangible tips that really don't even cost you more. They just, it's just making the right selection. Among your tips, you also talk about layering.

Layering A Collected Lived-In Look

Lyssia Katan 27:54

What exactly does that entail? Layering in a way that feels really homey and and and good.

Alyssa Martin 28:01

Yeah, so um, I think a room that looks layered and another word I like to use a lot is collected. So sort of over time, you're continually creating and a space is continually evolving with you and your life and the experiences that you've had. So um one suggestion that I haven't even put out there yet, but this is what I do with my own home. So I'll give you a little sneak peek because I've got a real coming out about it. But yeah, um, so I like to take a home and I like to get every room to sort of the same level. So maybe the first level is like paint and new bedding and a rug or something. Um, and then once you kind of get every room to that space, to that, to that level, then the next then you go back in and you go, okay, now we're gonna add another element. So maybe it's trim or you know, some like molding on the wall, or maybe it's um we're gonna add drapes to every room, or maybe it's we're gonna add wallpaper to the paint that, you know, we're gonna add some wallpaper, or um maybe it, yeah, you know, and then once you get to that level, then you're gonna go to the next level. Maybe you're gonna go try to really um thrift and and find some unique pieces to infuse into each space. Maybe that's different lamps or different decor pieces, or some um, I don't know, little frames on a nightstand that show, you know, have cute photos of your family on vacation in black and white or something like that. And sort of just go and try to get every room to the next um level. So every space is looking great and on par, but then there's always an element of a space evolving and you're adding layers and you're going, oh, well, you're gonna go on this beach vacation. I found this really cool, like shell vase that will remind me of that vacation. I'm gonna bring that home and you know what? I'm gonna swap it out with this cheapo vase I got from HomeGoods, and I'm gonna, and I that just fits this space so much better. And over time, you have this layered, collected place that just tells a story as you walk in the door, and it feels like home. You walk in, it feels like a warm, welcoming hug where all of your worries and all of your busyness can just be out the door and you can just truly relax and let down in your space. And that's what home should be.

Lyssia Katan 30:24

Yeah, and and and and that makes me think of your dad's travels, right? Your your dad has traveled all over the world. When you're looking at a piece, you're like, oh, I remember that trip, or oh, I remember that memory, or the beach vacation. And it's almost like these items talk to you and you're just surrounded by things and memories that you love in your space.

Alyssa Martin 30:45

Yeah, exactly. And that's what makes your home different from someone else's, too. Like, I don't know, I I I would not want I the worst thing ever to me is a home that looks identical to someone else's. Like, okay, maybe you have the same rug that you bought from somewhere, but like I want my home to be something totally different and special and unique to me and my family. And so those are the things that make that

Landscaping That Softens And Elevates

Alyssa Martin 31:08

happen.

Lyssia Katan 31:08

So you also talk a lot about landscape and plants and shrubs. Where did you get that inspiration?

Alyssa Martin 31:16

Yeah, and so I cannot consider myself a professional in that area, but I love it so much and I study it so much, I just can't help but like share what I've learned, you know, with everybody. So um, I did not know that I was that crazy granny chic plant lady until like uh we had our own home and I started investing in landscape. We bought this house, we bought our house and it had zero landscaping, zero, which uh I there's a huge benefit into buying a home with mature landscaping. That's on a different note, but um, it had zero. So I knew I was like, oh, I gotta do something here, and I always loved like true English, like French, um traditional landscaping with, you know, like taper, like you know, head boxwood hedges and hydrangeas that overflow and just oh, this is like a weight of my heart. So I just started figuring out, you know, just started planting stuff, and I've revised these beds so many times, trying to just get them just right or tweak this over here. My probably my you know, it's it's a toxic trait. I I don't think a plant has ever stayed where I've actually put it the first time, but but all that to say, um, so yeah, a lot of it just comes from studying so much. I when I when I find I'm passionate about something, I just started I started seeing how it's transforming our house and it softened edges and it um brought life to, you know, we have just a stone exterior. Well, it's pretty, but it's just really harsh, and it's you know, like there's nothing that was softened, or the greenery adds so much life and color and um just real something natural to the space. So I started seeing wow, this really transforms a house and a space. And um, I think you know, bringing plants inside does the same thing, but all that to say, um, I started learning and studying and figuring out Oklahoma's sun is brutal, man. It's it's uh a whole nother level. And so, of course, I can't say anything about Miami. I bet it's pretty bad there too.

Lyssia Katan 33:22

I but the foliage is pretty impressive, I will say. The foliage just walking down the street, phenomenal.

Alyssa Martin 33:27

Okay, okay, yes. So, anyways, just sort of figuring out um wow, this can really transform a space. So, let me learn how to do this better, and also learning that there are so many tricks that you can spend, like I said, the same amount of money on plants, but buying the right ones and planting them in the right way can make your garden look expensive or it can make it look just total hodgepodge. And so figuring out those little tips and tricks to tweak and spend the same amount of money and come out with a lot better outcome, how rewarding is that?

Lyssia Katan 34:00

Yeah, and the fact that they come by every year. Like I um I never really thought I love plants, but I never really thought much about landscaping. But in my parents' house that I grew up in, my dad he loves plants and loves the garden, and he always is like planting something and and things are blooming all the time. And every time I go, I'm like, Dad, the garden looks great. He's like, just wait, just wait. And then really a few weeks later, it is blossoming the hydrangeas and the lilacs, and and it's really an art. Like it's really like the hedges, it's something that makes a space feel like home. It's ever changing, like you mentioned throughout the seasons. It looks very different in the fall than it does in the spring. It uh looks beautiful, and I feel like it's something people sometimes overlook. Do you do you feel that way too?

Alyssa Martin 34:48

Yes, absolutely. I think, I think a lot of times people just go to the nursery and they're like, that rose looks good, and they'll just like put it in their yard. And it's like, okay, like that individual plant is pretty, but that doesn't go. It doesn't flow. There's no thought behind it, there's no intention behind where these plants are going. And um, you really want to be able to step back and look at the house or look at, yeah, look at the house or the space, the building, whatever, and say, and have your eye flow naturally from you know, from across the room and you and have colors that pop up, you know, rule of thirds and the 70-30 color rule and the golden ratio, like all these things that um they all say are important. Well, they are. That's how it makes, that's why you look at a space like at your parents' house and say, this is gorgeous, and um, you know, staggering balloon times and different things like that. So there's so many tricks to just create this space that's um beautiful, but it's an art, like you said. And I think that may be one reason why I love it so much is I just love all things creative and art. And I just started realizing, like, oh my goodness, you know, I don't, I'm not really one to sit down and paint with a paintbrush, but you can create a beautiful work of art by just planting some plants and watching them grow. And how rewarding is that? And not to mention you get to look at your beautiful house every day.

Lyssia Katan 36:12

And it's natural. And and and something you you spend a lot of time talking about is this golden ratio that you mentioned that's found in nature. Can

Golden Ratio Rules For The Eye

Lyssia Katan 36:20

you tell us about that? The roses and the the bugs and birds.

Alyssa Martin 36:25

Yeah, so it's a ratio that's like one to 1.618, which means like nothing to most people, even me. Like I told you, I'm not a math person, so I'm like, oh, what? Um, but a lot of that just sort of it's these natural curves that your eye wants to see. So when you look at a space, that you might even can think of some garden beds in your head, but you know, there's these big like natural curves and flows to how people create garden beds um or or other things in nature, like the natural way that a rose is made up. You know, you can think of the petals and how they they go like this, or a shell, I can go like this because that's kind of how a shell is created. So it's the natural way that nature sort of um curves or the ratio it uses, just and then our natural eye loves that. Like we just think it's aesthetically pleasing. It's it's amazing. It's like God created these things on purpose. But um, so yes, when you use that ratio, you can get it, you don't have to like do math really. You can do things like rule of thirds. So, like even a 60-40 split, you know, you have like a bench, maybe that's a focal point, and you don't center it directly in the center. If you have a line of sight, you don't want something directly in the center, you'd want it like shifted over here. So then you're gonna have your bench, that's a focal point, or you could have it could be like a little seating area, or you know, a big tree, even. And then you have some plants over here. But how much better does it look to the eye naturally if it's here rather than here? Um, and so learning things like that, and you can you can do this ratio sort of too with even things like color, like a 70-30 split of color. Like uh maybe you have 70% of your garden is green and white, and then 30% you have a pop of color with purple or something like that. Um so it's just using this ratio, and you might think too, like when you're laying out your garden beds, like something just doesn't feel right, like it jets off over here, and somehow it needs to curve a little bit wider over here. Some people have it natural, I think have an eye naturally that just sees that, and maybe some people don't so much. Maybe that's where the math comes more into play. But a lot of rule of thirds, you know, always use odd numbers instead of um even numbers up to about 15. So you're gonna use three or three plants in in a row versus four. There's just something about the eye with the asymmetry that is pleasing.

Lyssia Katan 38:56

Do you you find that in in interior decor too, right? Like where you have a vase and maybe a couple, like a candle or a trinket dish, something like that, where it's the high and the low balance.

Alyssa Martin 39:07

Yeah, absolutely. And also not, you know, just uh so there's something about true symmetry too. So you can think about a console table and maybe you have two identical lamps on either side, and then you have something in the middle. Okay, so that that's one thing, and that is pleasing to the eye if it's like true symmetry, especially with interiors. But exteriors too, you think about like two boxwood topiaries flanking a front door. That's like very um stately appearance that is naturally a uh pleasing to the eye, too. And that's that's a big deal. But um, if you're gonna go asymmetrical, then that is also loved. So you could maybe have you think about the same console table, you could have a tall lamp here, and then you maybe have like um, you know, something shorter over here, like maybe not another lamp, because that would be kind of weird, but you could maybe have like a like a vase with some flowers and something in the middle that's shorter. So it the same rules apply too on the interior. Um, if you're doing asymmetrical, it's always better. Rule of thirds, so always, you know, three versus two, or um, and then the same thing with like off-centering things. I think people uh a lot of times automatically assume just like just put it up against the wall in the center of the room. Yeah, well, actually, sometimes that's like the worst thing you could possibly do. Sometimes it's just like, hey, my daughter has a twin bed in her room. She wanted, we had, you know, we just she didn't need a queen size bed. And like, I think initially people were like, well, stick it in the middle. Well, guess what? That looks so funny. Like the scale, the proportion was off. It was just dead center in the room. So we scooted it. It's not, it's not up against the wall. Not that it can't ever be, but it's not jammed in the corner. We pulled it off against the wall a couple of feet, but it's over, you know, it's asymmetrical as we have our bed over here, and then over here we have a dresser, and it just you walk in and you're like, uh, you know, you relax a little bit. It's like a deep breath.

Lyssia Katan 41:01

And so it's just naturally pleasing to the eye. And it gives you a little bit more space. You're not putting it right in the middle and saying, This is where it's gonna go. You're able to have room for the dresser or room for a play area, or a rug, where it's sometimes people who are not very design-oriented or it doesn't come as naturally, they just stick it right in the middle. And it's it's it's I feel like with everything, the intentions are good, like the long drapes, the intentions are good, but sometimes it's just a little bit of tweaking that makes a world of a difference.

Alyssa Martin 41:28

Yeah, and anybody can do this though, truly. Like, I hear people, they're like, Well, I'm just not good at it. And I'm like, okay, that's where I come into play because um, like, yeah, I could do it for you, but a lot of these people are saying, like, well, I don't have the money to like hire an interior designer. And I'm like, I know, but you can do this. Like, I I hope that this is approachable, like feels approachable for you because that's my goal. It like you don't have to have an eye for design, you don't have to have a big, beautiful house. We see these mansions on Pinterest, and we just think like, well, that's never gonna be neat.

Trend Mistakes And Design Confidence

Alyssa Martin 42:03

Well, guess that's like never gonna be like 99% of the population. Like that, you know, is great to look at and gather inspiration from, but like we all know that's not really like in reach for a lot of us. And I just think that any home, whether it's a humble home or a fixer, a fixer-up home, an old home that just needs some updates, or you're just strictly using what you've got, like you can make it pretty, you can make it beautiful. And there's just a few small tweaks that you can change, and I really believe can like transform a space and make it some place that you love to live.

Lyssia Katan 42:37

Your content focuses a lot about exactly that, like giving people the confidence to create their spaces and design homes that they love. Did you find that a lot of people just didn't have or still don't think they can do it? Like you said, it's a job for a professional or a job for someone who's photographing for Pinterest. Do you feel like people just don't have the confidence to be able to do this?

Alyssa Martin 42:59

Yeah, I think people just write it off. Like they just think, well, I'm not good at it, so I can't do it. And it's like, no, like I always say just start, you know. But what I kind of mean by that too is like I didn't know what I was doing either. Like a decade ago, I was like, I don't even know what my style is, and I don't know how to achieve it. Like, but I'm just gonna start because I I feel like I can do this, I but I'm gonna have to just try my best, you know? And so I'm always like, just they're like, well, I don't know where to hang the photo this this piece of art. And I'm like, well, just put a nail in the wall. Like, just but and they're like, yeah, but then there's a hole in the wall, and I'm like, well, then just put another hole in the wall. Like, you put it in the wrong place, like it's okay, just like move it. Or like I have repainted rooms so many times. Ask my husband, because you know what? I painted it and I'm like, okay, I don't hate it. I feel like I could love this more. So I'm gonna learn from that, and then I'm just gonna like repaint it this other color, and then I nail it, and I'm like, that's what I was going. For. Okay, so now what did I learn from that? I learned to look more at the undertones. I learned I love, you know, warmer tones than the cooler tones. I learned, I know, like I learned I'm really drawn to this specific color palette. Like whatever it may be, just like if things are not permanent forever and ever and ever. Like you can shift things around. And for goodness sake, a hole in the wall. Are you kidding me? Also, buy it, and if you hate it, then return it. I'm the queen of returns. You can't tell online anybody, anyways. You know, like designers return stuff all the time because they get it in and they're like, oh, that oatmeal is really more gray, you know? And you just can't tell that tone online. Nobody can. So um, yeah, and I think people are just afraid of making a mistake. And I'm like, well, join the club. Like, you're gonna make a mistake. Don't be afraid of like that's not failure, that's just like one step closer to success, you know? So people anybody can do it.

Lyssia Katan 44:55

What's a mistake that you made early on that you're like, yup, lesson learned?

Alyssa Martin 45:00

Oh, I've made there's quite a few, but I will give you the biggest one, and that is I fell victim to the millennial gray trend. I really did. I did it. It's me. I know. Oh, it's like killing my soul. Um, no, we renovated our house. This was, you know, whatever, seven years ago when I started all of this, and I just saw on Pinterest, um, I always had warm houses. So I don't really know why I thought that this would be something I liked. I think I just was trying to create this is where I see a lot of people doing this, but I was trying to create a beautiful house. And in my head, that's what everyone was telling me was a beautiful house. And so as far as the millennial gray trend went, I made it a beautiful house. But I quickly realized like it's not what I love. That's not what I want to live in. It's not cozy, it's not, you know, it's just not um something that is like relatable for me. So um I painted everything. Actually, the journey of getting to the paint color was like a roller coaster, like um, because I kept picking these like repos gray, Sherman's reposed gray. Everyone was like, oh, this is the color. I put it up on the wall and I was like, wow, that's hideous. And my like I did not like it in my house. I'm not saying it's hideous everywhere, but in my house, I had north facing, you know, windows. It was just very cool. It looked almost blue. I was like, well, this isn't gonna work. So I just slowly was getting like warmer and warmer and warmer. And then someone finally said to me, Why do you have to paint it gray? Like, don't you like it? Seems like you don't really like gray. And I was like, Well, I have to like gray because that's what everyone likes, you know? And so I ended up with agreeable gray, which is like the warmest gray you can get. Um, and then I've quite agreeable. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's fine. It it really was pretty. Like everybody loved my house, but I just was like, but it doesn't feel like home to me. So luckily, paint is just paint. Like I said, you can always fix it. So I've like slowly gone through and like repainted everything, warmer tones, but that, and then um, the other biggest thing, and this is something I see people do a lot too, is not paying very close attention to the architectural style of their home. So um we have a little cottage, and we had um the original fireplace in this house was this, it was oh my gosh, so hideous, but it was this stone fireplace, and it was it really did need a lot of work. Like it really was not cute. Like to this day, I'm like, ooh, not cute. But I think I could have actually taken it and like transformed it with what was there, but instead we ripped it all out and I put in this fireplace that um what it is pretty, it's pretty, it's just not doesn't fit the style of our home. So that's probably the biggest mistake that I've made, and I'm fully willing to admit it. Like I'm trying to think of ways to make it look more cottagey, just because like it is such a focal point in our house. Um, and so it's like like I said, it's a beautiful fireplace. It just doesn't fit in a cottage style home. So that's another big thing that people should pay attention to.

Lyssia Katan 48:12

Right, where it just looks like it's out of place, even though it is objectively beautiful.

Alyssa Martin 48:17

Yeah. In a different home, it would be stunning. It just exactly. In my home, you walk in and you're like, okay, like a white subway tile herringbone that doesn't really go with like the you know cottage core you have going on on the outside. And so, but like I said, it was a lesson I had to learn, and I'm so glad I went for it. I still don't regret, like, you know, I would change the way I did it, but hindsight's 2020, like I had to learn from that. That was uh something I had to learn from. I didn't know to look to for that years and years ago. So it's okay. Everyone just go for it, you know, change it later if you don't like it.

Lyssia Katan 48:55

Well, that's exactly what I was gonna ask. What is your advice for someone who is scared of making the wrong choice or putting the hole in the wrong spot or making it maybe a very expensive mistake that they'll regret later?

Alyssa Martin 49:07

Yeah, so I think the biggest thing is that your foundational pieces are timeless. So that's gonna be like hardwoods, oh my god, or flooring in general. But you know, you're never gonna go wrong with hardwoods, um, you know, carpet, that's easy, that's even easily replaced, you know, things like that. Um, and getting your foundational pieces right, if you're gonna gut your kitchen, then let's like make sure that your kitchen is very expensive to redo a kitchen. So there are things that you can tweak for not very expensive, like the color of the cabinets and things like that. But in general, so those are things that either A, you might want to get help on if you're really stuck, um, or B, just do a lot of studying. You know, luckily there's like so many resources out there now from Pinterest and then also just books and things that you can read to sort of really hone in on what you love and your style. Just start penning things that you love and figuring out the commonalities between them. Like what are all these images that I love have, you know, walnut-colored hardwoods. Okay, well, I'm I guess maybe I love walnut-colored hard hardwoods or whatever it may be. But then it will sort of help you narrow down what your style is and just try to study real hard and get those foundational pieces right as close as you can. And then um, beyond that, then just go for it. Because, you know, a hole in the wall, oh my gosh, that's so easy to fix. Or paint colors even like you can just have fun with that. Or, you know, there's a lot of things that you can have fun with that are super easy to change or um inexpensive to change. But that would be my my advice on those foundational pieces. Really try to figure out what you need to do to make those right. And then beyond that, have fun.

AI Inspiration Without Losing Your Style

Lyssia Katan 50:50

What do you think about using technology to for inspiration, like taking a picture of a console table and asking AI, what would you put here?

Alyssa Martin 50:58

Yeah, I mean, I think that's great. I think sometimes though AI, well, AI is coming along, right? But it's it's not quite there in a lot of things. But the problem is sometimes AI will give you, for instance, something that looks beautiful, but it's not your style. It's not what you love. And so then you're stuck with like, this is where I was years ago, whereas like you almost feel like you're being told this is what is beautiful, versus there's like it's there's a million things that are beautiful. You need to figure out what you feel is the right choice for your house. And AI doesn't know all those things. AI doesn't know what you love and doesn't know um what is the right style for your house. And they don't know what is in the room next door that really this is why this giant console table with no feet that looks too bulky right here, that's not gonna work because you have this other piece over here that has is a focal point. You know what I mean? So it can't like read everything. But to some extent, yes, it could give you insight on like, oh, okay, great, like that's a good idea. I could put two lamps that are symmetrical on either side with some books in between and a candle or something, and that would look really good. Or oh, I could put a bunch of little frames with black and white images on these. Oh, that's a good idea. And you can tailor it to your style and things, but it's not, it's not objective. Beauty is not objective. So just because AI or any Pinterest or anyone else, all the designers with all the trends that are popular, just because they say this is what's beautiful, that doesn't mean anything. Maybe it's one way that looks beautiful, but there's lots of ways. So find the ones that work for you and then also for your house.

Lyssia Katan 52:39

That's really good advice. And throughout, I mean, throughout your videos, you've redone rooms multiple times. How do you know when a room finally feels right?

Knowing When A Room Feels Right

Alyssa Martin 52:50

Oh man, I think a lot of that is a feeling. Can't you tell in the space that I'm just kidding? By the way, this is um I had to I had to leave my house because my children are just far too loud. So I am in my husband's workplace. They have really good internet connection and they have this really I love the lighting. Anyway, no, so this is not my home, okay. I am just this is just where I had to be. Um, but uh in my own house, okay. You can go to my Instagram to look at my own house, and I've got these nice posters on the wall. It's great. In my own house, how do I know in a space that feels complete? Um a lot of it is a feeling of just it a lot of it, I have a vision, you know, going into it. And sometimes that shifts and changes along the way as I'm sort of taking my time to design it. Um, but usually at least it's somewhat close to the beginning vision that I have. So um there is just a feeling of wow, I nailed that pink color. So like I was doing my daughter's nursery um last year, and I just struggled to find, I knew I was looking for a very, very muted pink, not pink pink, like I said, but almost beigier, like a like a really pink beige. Um and I just I looked at every color, I think, on the mark. It just was somehow with the way the room was facing, the light coming in, it just they all were looking orange. And I finally just after sample after sample came across one that I was like, that's it, that's the right color. Um, and so you know, I I think I could do that individually with decisions. You know, I maybe, okay, that's the right bedding. Oh, that is the woven shade I want for this space. That is that lamp, the structure of it just somehow works, or that bed is the right frame or the right wood tone or whatever. Um, but I'd like to challenge you with one thing and just say, like, I don't know if a room is ever actually done. Is that okay to say? Like, I think it could be done for now. Um, maybe that's intimidating to some people. I enjoy it, so maybe I don't even want it to be done. Um, but I I think it's okay to say like a room continually evolves. Because there's every space that I'm like, this is done for now. Like, here's my Instagram reveal. I'm gonna have another reveal for you in this same room in like two months because you know what? I'm gonna go thrifting, I'm gonna find something that's better. But that's where like the layering and the collecting, that's where that all comes into play. Like you're always trying to better that. It doesn't mean you're like repainting it and like redesigning everything. It just means like you're swapping out little things that make that space feel even so much better than it did. So is that yeah, is that helpful? I don't know. But I think a room should continually evolve, just like our life continually evolves and our experiences continually evolve. But yeah, there is a feeling of like, I nailed that paint color. That one's good.

Lyssia Katan 55:45

But that's also true. We're evolving. Your kids are growing up, right? They're they might need a nursery now, but need uh a game room later or a mud room or whatever it is. So we're constantly evolving, and having a space that stays the same forever isn't really good for any of us. It needs to change with us.

Alyssa Martin 56:02

I think people will spend the thousands of dollars, redo their a room, and it's like picture perfect in their brain, and then they're scared to touch it for years to come. They're like, well, that room's already done. And I'm like, well, okay, yeah, but if this isn't working for you anymore, then let's tweak it so that it's even better for you. Or look at all these cool pieces you've collected, you know. So, but you get bored of it too.

Lyssia Katan 56:23

Yeah, our taste change too.

Alyssa Martin 56:26

Yeah, exactly.

Final Takeaways And How To Support

Lyssia Katan 56:27

So, what would you like someone listening to this podcast to take away or remember?

Alyssa Martin 56:32

That you can have a beautiful home at a price that you can afford. It is approachable, it is doable, it is achievable. You can do this. Just start. And it can be if that's a high-end, if you have the budget to go out and buy high-end things, great. And if you have $15 a month to add towards your home, that's great. Like you can do it. You can take some time and energy, learn your style, learn how to make it a home, and you can have a place that is a safe haven when you walk in the door. It feels like a warm hug, a place that you can relax and a place that you can let down and have the memories of all the best things in your life right there at home.

Lyssia Katan 57:14

That is amazing. Alyssa, thank you so much for all your knowledge and insights. And we're gonna be linking your account below so people can follow and continue to get amazing advice from you. But thank you for inspiring people to really build homes that they love and that feel collected and feel like them.

Alyssa Martin 57:30

Absolutely. Thank you so much for having me. Always feel free to reach out with on DM or anything. I'd love to chat with all y'all.

Lyssia Katan 57:35

Of course. Thank you so much for spending this time with me on Room2think. If you enjoyed this episode, feel free to follow the show, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who you think would really appreciate a more thoughtful approach to their space. You can find more Design Meets Psychology insights on social, in our community, and definitely in upcoming episodes so you can build a better life by design. Thanks again for listening. I'll see you next time.